Here comes the furious five of fury.
1. Madonna: She's finally proved herself to be the female David Bowie by inviting Gogol Bordello to perform with her for her live show. You really can buy yourself hip.
2. Ozzy Osbourne: Another milestone reached as the Ozzman finally got a star on the walk of fame, in Birmingham. England. I wonder how long the wait list is on that walk.
3. Black Eyed Peas: MORE HONORS! The Peas topped Rolling Stone's Most Annoying Songs list with their Grammy Award-winning "My Humps."
4. All-American Rejects: Have you ever been so overwhelmed by the douchebag-saturation of the world that you don't even feel the need to do anything about it? Yeah. That's how I feel whenever I hear someone say that they like this band. Or more importantly, that they DON'T find this band to be an assault on good taste. This occurred the other day, and almost spoiled some friendships.
5. Linkin Park: Every time during Transformers when that single started playing, I got the incredible urge to not pay attention to the 40-foot robots ripping chunks out of buildings and each other. Shockingly new levels of bland have infiltrated what was at one point the vanguard genre of people who hated being bland. Listen to me, kids: Linkin Park is not rebellion. It's what your parents and record execs want you to believe rebellion is.